January 31, 2010

Join the Bike Porn Tour (again)

Think you have what it takes to be part of the Bike Porn Tour?

YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT SOLDIER!


Can you strike up a conversation with total strangers and pimp bikes and sex?

Can you deal with being inside a confined space for hours at a time with the same people?

Do you posses a license to drive?

Do you possess a moderate understanding of the Engrish Language and can you use that to further the Bikesexual Industry?

Can you keep your belongings organized? Can you keep your shit together? (literal and figurative interpretations apply)

Do you know shit about A/V electronics, projectors, selling merchandise, saying "no" to people, saying "yes" to people,

Do you like to pose for the camera? Can you get others to pose for you?

Can you live without making money, sleeping on floors and couches?

Do you urn to ride your bike all over the fucking place?

Can you wake up and get shit done after rocking hard all night? Every night? For 100 nights in a row? (you can't, so don't lie) We will take a few breaks, but expect to have a show most nights. If you frequently get lost and your friends are pissed at you because they spent a couple days of the vacation looking for you, this is probably the wrong tour. We have a schedule so tight we are crapping diamonds. (Thanks Ferris B.)




TO APPLY

Email and explain who you are and why the hell you want to come on this tour:
bikesmut@gmail.com

Applications are due Wednesday, February 10th at 5pm. The Backlash Tour leaves PDX on Monday, February 15th and returns no later than June 2010.

Compensation is based on performance. We will be selling everything we can to pay our way. Benefits will include: new friends, sexy fun, a big adventure, and a lifetime of memories. This is not a get rich quick scheme, but your compensation should be able to cover your costs depending on your personal budgeting.

REPEAT: This is a shit ton of fun and amazing way to see the country. This is not a very good way to make money. Most of your needs will be taken care of (housing, food, booze). After those costs are paid the most we usually have left are the blurry scarred memories... however, after the last tour we were able to privde a small bonus to our crew.

3 comments:

  1. Am I already in? Or shall I reapply...

    See you in a mere week at Minibike Winter!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow, I can't believe I missed this. next year.

    ReplyDelete
  3. XXX vids porn iphonepornvid movie. Free porn movie redtubemobile videos. High porn videos freegermansex porn.

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