July 25, 2018

THURSDAY! OUR LAST SHOW IN CANADA!

SAVE THE RIO!

In most cities there are few venues where Bike Smut can present. Often we find ourselves in a backyard, or underground art gallery, which is fine for an intimate show, but when there's hundreds of people who want to watch it together... that's when we need a proper cinema!

We don't envy the difficulty of running a modern theater. Most filmmakers are not exactly easy to deal with and have an unrealistic expectation of their upcoming success.

From our perspective it's hard enough convincing people that we are actually a real event. Once you get beyond the spam filters and gatekeepers you still have to negotiate the taboo of having a night of profound exploration of how we move and fuck.

This challenges so much about who we are. Its rare to have spaces that can properly ride the line between risk taking in their programming and keeping their own doors open. The Rio here in Vancouver is on the bubble. They continually have interesting, provocative, independent art. But they are feeling the pinch. In a culture that can't see tomorrow because of the money they could make today, these places are always on the edge of capitalism's knife.

Thankfully The Rio is not just waiting for the axe to fall, they are actually doing something about it. The #SaveTheRio campaign has raised millions and is close to achieving its goal of making it so that they can buy the venue and have a little more breathing room in the future.

The deadline for this is August 1st so in addition to the community, nonprofit bike shops Bike Smut donates to while in Vancouver we are also splitting the proceeds with The Rio. We've had our last couple shows here and we can't imagine anywhere else we would go in Vancouver.


July 11, 2018

Kanucks gonna Kafuck... Bikes! The LAST EVER show in VANCOUVER, BC

We have news.

News about us.

And Canada.

Its serious.



We have said Bike Smut is in transition, but really its more like hibernation. Once a season we come out of our cave covered in scrawled drawings of tallbikes welded from Colnago frames, rub our eyes, then rub our saddles... with our genitals. We check up on our friends organizing the various World Naked Bike Rides (they are good!), check to see how the ice caps are doing (they are not good!)



Then we put together some glorious scheme, trek some epic distance, and then after an astounding presentation of sexualized mobility we return to our cave to slumber away the pain of modern car culture and exploitative pornography.



After doing more than a show every week for 10 years are shows are few and far between. So each time they happen it feels like it could be the last one. This is likely the last ever screening in Canada!

Vancouver, BC

Thursday, July 26th 2018

The Rio Theatre



more details as they get typed. Bears wake up grumpy. WE'RE AWAKE! FED AND NO LONGER GRUMPY!



June 27, 2018

WORLD NAKED BIKE RIDE REPORT


the fabulous poster art from PDXWNBR.ORG


Following the rides in Los Angeles and Portland its worth getting some first hand accounts from the people who actually showed up and put some skin in the game.

photo by larameeee

Portland's ride gathered in Cathedral Park under the St. John's Bridge in North Portland at 8pm and depared at 9. Of course when you have more then ten thousand people departing it takes a while to disperse. Thankfully there was music by the High Step Society and the sidewalks were lined with countless enthusiastic supporters and a few people that were worried their clothes might not make it to the afterlife.
even naked bikers have their haters
The ride winded its way to Woodlawn park, about 7 miles away a pretty short ride, historically speaking. Of course most were not done partying and there were several options to choose from including following the Tiki Bike to a undisclosed beach party along the Columbia River.


There are some insightful comments on Bike Portland (and some obnoxious ones)
and some photos from

Apparently both I-5 traffic and ICE were invited to eat naked biker ass.

Now we move our attentions down the west coast a thousand miles to Los Angeles, where about 400 people joined in two daytime, naked celebratory protests of a different, uh flavor.
-----
We met in an industrial corridor of downtown LA at 9am, just across the train tracks from the skyline. A friend visiting from Phoenix joined me. We were some of the first to arrive, and when we did, at first it definitely had a very SoCal ex-hippy naturist vibe to it.
As it began to fill in, the group became much more diverse in age, race, and gender expression. Everyone was very welcoming and friendly, and we all took pictures with each other. It felt very relaxed and supportive. There were a couple taco trucks, body paint lead by the teenage daughter of one of the organizers, and overall had a very kid-friendly vibe. Very diverse in terms of age range.
At 10:30 we began the first leg of the ride.
LA WNBR is technically split into two shorter rides. The first leg it the political part and goes through the downtown municipal buildings boldly stating our messages: freedom from fuel and legal toplessness for everyone. We rode past the highway then headed back to the starting point.
Then we geared up for the second leg of the trip, where we were joined by many more riders totaling about 350 at its peak. The organizers provided water for the riders, and people were able to buy food at the trucks. There were also a few different groups tabling: naturalists, LA history buffs, and WNBR organizers mainly.
We left for the second leg of the ride, and rode through downtown, through Chinatown, and down the LA River Path. It was beautiful. People came out of shops and restaurants and cheered us on, smiling and saying they'd join us next year.
It was an extremely welcoming ride, I think having it during the day gives it a very different feel.
We stopped at a restaurant that was located just off the River Path, the restaurant let us use the bathrooms and order food and drinks and we were very well received by staff and patrons.
Then we headed back through the neighborhoods, and eventually wound around to the starting point again. People hung out and talked and networked when we got back, then it eventually dispersed at about 5:30pm.
It was very fun to experience WNBR in a new city for my 10th year doing it. I plan on getting involved with the organizers next year. It is a smaller ride, but it is mighty, and I think it is doing some really wonderful things.

(Pic below: me and part of the LA skyline.)




This weekend Vancouver and Victoria, BC host their WNBRs!
Find them! Support them! Join them! As bare as you dare!!

June 20, 2018

THE SEASON TO RIDE NAKED

Dear readers, we have failed you.

For 10 years we have documented our seemingly perpetual sojourn for joy and liberation. Embracing  self-mobilization and and sex-positivity as our our primary tool of emancipation from single-occupancy cars and general puritanical bullshit we have doggedly traveled and shared these ideas with the world. We are quite proud of our accomplishments but even with a massive collection of radical art the gratitude of our audience we are humbled by many of our best theoretical ideals so simply put into direction action by the participation in the World Naked Bike Ride.
Already in 2018 so many naked rides have come and gone. Besides the entire Southern Hemisphere (where they ride in March) Chicago, Toronto, Austin, Madison, New Orleans, Mexico City BrusselsThessaloniki, Manchester, Cambridge, Brighton and Bristol, all had rides in the past 10 days. But where we when all this naked action was going down?

Promoting and documenting our own plucky little film and performance festival is the primary thrust of this blog but we must not turn our backsides on the news and cultural phenomenon that works towards our ideals.
Alas, our primary organizers are worn. Despite slowing the number of shows to a polite trickle we are still not staying on top of our stated goals of sharing excellent ideas that mirror ours. The wear on our tires is starting to show but we are still rolling (more or less) and we are hopeful that these rare moments when we actually have something to chirp about will be appreciated that much more (said every blogger since 2012).

We have slowed the fuck down and we need to make amends. The only way we can think of to make it up to you is sharing some photo-heavy pictures from naked rides around the world.
Chicago has one of the largest rides in the world
We express our regret being unable to participate in the rides of the past; now let us embrace the sweet anticipation of rides to come!
The brilliant smiles of Bristol, UK
June 23
Portland, Oregon
Los Angeles

June 30
Vancouver, BC
Victoria, BC ... ah... well maybe having it the same day can help?

July 7
Amsterdam

July 14
Halifax,
Buffalo,

July 21
Helsinki, Finland 
Boston
St. Louis

September 8
Las Vegas
A misty night in Chicago

Have you ridden a bicycle naked? In public? As a visitor to a new place?!? It is pretty exciting to visit a city during a WNBR. As a spectator or a fully-presenting nude-tourist (... a Nudurist?) it's an exhilarating way to experience a city. But before you increase your carbon footprint, check to see if there is a naked ride happening near you. This website: http://worldnakedbikeride.org/ is a helpful place to get started. Just imagine, you could plant the seed that blooms into a naked revolution!




The WNBR in Thessaloniki, Greece included a sit in. protest + celebration = revolutionary party!
And even if you don't think you will join a naked ride take a moment to consider the creative slogans that YOU would present on your body. As one of the most attention-getting forms of peaceful protest its worthwhile keeping a catchy/cheerful/cheeky phrase in mind because you never know when a naked ride could happen and you will be completely unable to think up something clever in the moment. What's the best text you have read on a human body? Post your comment below and if it makes us smile we will send you a sticker in the fucking mail.
Is the Toronto WNBR mascot a mullet? No really! Go to their website then click on 2018 posters
====================
Thessaloniki pics by Φώτο Eurokinissi
Chicago Mist at Dusk photo by Brendan Forkin
Bright smiles from the Bristol WNBR 
Walgreen's Naked Bike Ride in Chicago photos by Raf Winterpacht
(warning some of these are FaceCrack links, which may be responsible for stealing souls, elections)

March 21, 2018

Science Friction in New Orleans!

Bike Smut is playing New Orleans! (or if you are imbibing in sufficient purple drank: Nawlyns)
 
Thursday, March 29th we want you to gear up! We are hosting a sexy sci-fi bike ride before the show, live performances and bonus surprises to end the night. Costumes and frivolous engagement are rewarded!

Ride from the Vortex Corner at 6:30pm, more details below

photo by rugged, outdoor personality, Franzia Ellers

Last time we were there we had some amazing performances!  
Gingerlicious and Claymazing were a big hit!



there was advocacy for improved safety in the streets AND between the sheets



even the local gambling machines got in on the action. Perhaps a sign of oncoming awareness of the upcoming theme, Science Friction







THURSDAY MARCH 29
ZEITGEIST ART CENTER
1618 ORETHA CASTLE HALEY (wheelchair accessible)

7:30 DOORS , 8PM SHOW
$10 SUGGESTED DONATION
WITH LIVE PERFORMANCE
ADULTS ONLY

SEXY SCI-FI BIKE RIDE!
THE VORTEX CORNER
FRANKLIN & ROYAL
6:30PM

(WARNING may steal all your personal info and/or sell your concept of democracy

ONE NIGHT ONLY!

 

March 1, 2018

Have Fun Storming New Castle

Whew! Well we do always like to go out with a bang and after the time Sydney gave us last night...


Wait, not Sidney, Sydney! The Australian cyclists came out in force to confirm their transportational sexuality. (some are purists but we hear many are also supportive of fucking on a train)

Tonight we are in New Castle for Australia's final screening. The Pacific Rim Job Tour: Part 2
Part 1 was when we showed Bike Smut on a beach in Homer Alaska, so now we only have to connect Asia and South America to complete the Chain Ring of Fire

our curator, Rev.Phil laying hands on the "Anal 2 Homer" in Alaska
For now we are content to conclude our first and possibly final visit to Australia. Yes, this might be the last time it ever screens in Australia. If you didn't know for the past 10 years we have averaged more than 50 shows a year (with most years being closer to 80 shows a year). This was made possible by a fervent commitment to share the surprisingly good art we were entrusted to present to you, our audience; also we were mostly homeless. But the years of perpetual touring have passed. Bike Smut is transforming; what it will become is, as of yet, unknown. Many excellent people claim they are ready to rise up and carry the flame for radical, human-powered, sex-positive film and performance. Still others have suggested that we abandon our archaic methods of in-person distribution and create a simultaneous, multi-city bikesexual webcast.



The future is unknown but at least for tonight you can have your home-grown bike porn... and watch it too!


Bike Smut in New Castle
Friday, March 2nd
The Royal Exchange
34 Bolton St, Newcastle, New South Wales 2300
8pm
$12 or $10 advance tickets OR if you join us for Critical Mass before the show!

Fb event page

Go ride with New Castle Critical Mass! It starts at 6pm from Civic Park.
Oh, you didn't know? Bike Smut loves Critical Mass! We even helped make a feature length documentary about its eventual death in "bike-friendly" Portland.

Thanks for making our tour of Australia possible. Give lots of affection to Miss Poppy Cox and buy those handmade panties while you still can. They go fast!!

Bike Smut panties by the_forgotten_art

February 28, 2018

Opening our Clamshell in Sydney

We have two more days in Australia. Come watch porn with us!!

Our Tucson audience enraptured in bikesexuality.  Photo by Keith Perfetti
Sometimes it's hot. Sometimes it's awkward. Sometimes it's funny. Sometimes it is something completely unexpected.

Like with bikes, the joy of sex is not trying to limit the experience but instead just being able to be present in the moment to enjoy the ride.
 
And its happening tonight in Sydney, Australia

Thursday, March 1st, 2018
The Red Rattler Theatre
6 Faversham St, Marrickville, New South Wales
7:30 - 10:30 pm
$12 adv + booking fee  $ 15 door

February 8, 2018

Pacific Rim Job Tour: Melbourne!

Miss Poppy Cox has just flown in from Berlin to Australia where she is coordinating with local bikesexuals to provide human-powered transportation satisfaction Down Under!

Its our pleasure to promote the 2nd stage of the Pacific Rim Job Tour.


Melbourne
Longplay
Sun, Feb 18th
TWO SCREENINGS: ENTIRLEY DIFFERENT CONTENT
7pm doors (screening at 7:30
9pm
$12 for one screening
$18 for both
 

Expect details for Sydney and Newcastle soon!



February 7, 2018

Crossing borders with intention

The US government is about to shut down, again. Are you a "real American" who wants to keep immigrants out of "our land? Or, do you recognize that a mostly arbitrary line separates the US and Mexico and has become a tool to divide people?
 
FUCK BORDERS!   photo of JRart
Mexicali is just south of the border between Mexico and California. Calexico is just north of that border. While not the largest this is surly the most convincingly named twin border towns between the US and Mexico. Given their proximity and shared agricultural history one might expect them to blend together but differences in the culture couldn’t be more obvious. Even thou a simple chain-link fence is all that separates the towns they are microcosmic representations of their respective countries. For a dusty southwest town, the suburban sprawl around Calexico is oddly clean, sterile even. It seems devoid of any culture (although time there years ago was limited) and while the Sun scorches both sides of the border with equal indifference the US side feels less inviting, colder.
 
Meanwhile Mexicali has the classic virtues of not giving a shit about appearances from the outside of the building but focus instead on whats inside. Their markets are designed to induce engagement. There are other major differences between of course. Mexicali being 10-times the population of Calexico has its obvious effects, never mind the United States’ insane healthcare policies that have created a massive medical tourist industry (something this blogger knows far more than this article will cover).  How these twins grew apart to reflect their countries cultural identities is its own story worth telling. 
 
But not here.

We are here to fuck borders & we are here to fuck bikes.
 
 
 
Bike Smut 9: Science Friction
Friday Feb 9th
The Hive
531 Oaxaca, Mexicali
7pm, donations accepted, 18+

https://www.facebook.com/events/1697486086979654/

December 25, 2017

exploit bikes for fun, not profit

BIKESEXUAL ALERT! ARE YOU SHIRKING YOUR DUTY TO YOUR OWN DESIRE??!?

Its not just a casual concern. We are feeling it too. There is so much stress and horror available without end. Our revolutionaries are not operating at their full capacity if they are not keeping their own fires stoked at home. So please try to answer the question: are you making space for the development of your mobilized, sexualized self?

Moreover, is this the crap Santa delivers when we neglect to actually ask for things we want?










It could just be another sign of the coming apocalypse (there are many, we know) but it could be a sign that you and we and everyone are letting bastards win. Whenever the d-bags, like Logan Paul have their way with pop culture they usually take something as beautiful and inspiring as the song "Handlebars" and pervert it into an vapid reason boost their fragile ego. So if we don't react to the inherent objectification with derisive scorn we end up letting our pure bikesexual waters become tainted and tho Bike Smut may be slowing down (... a lot) that shaln't happen on our watch!

For the appropriate background here is the original video by Flobots




And since modern culture eats sentiment and shits piles of post-digested manure, here is the cis/white/hetero/male scat you have been fearing was being squeezed out:



But we are not content to just be casual observers of media. We got a fucking degree in this shit and worked print, broadcasting, street media, trade journal, industries. We get to take a swift crack at this cracker's ass.



WHAT DOES THIS VIDEO REALLY MEAN?

does it mean that Paul:
- can ride a bike without handlebars, although it never once happens in the video?
- can have sex without using his hands? A subliminal request for bondage?
- can ride a woman with a smaller mustache than him?
- can inspire women to throw off their patriarchal burdens by standing up for themselves?
- gets punched in the mouth so often he is secretly advocating for dental health?

Thankfully, rather than let this trash go on unaddressed the Flowbots provided their own retort:



So here is our  New Years resolution: To be thankful for our awareness of the radical, independent media that already exists! There's lots of it out there and we love it! We enjoy the Intercept and Democracy Now almost every day. Partly because they keep us reminded that some media outlets are not paid for by corporations that benefit from endless war.

We believe most people actually desire this kind of truth but are frequently overwhelmed by the never ending torrent of crap that is shoved down our collective throats. We can all do better and engage in more uplifting media that if it punches at all, it punches up!
(also, this really was posted on a Media Monday, which hasn't happened in years so there's something else to be thankful for)


NOTE: there is a good chance that Bike Smut will travel to Australia in February. Finally making the Pacific Rim Job Tour a reality and one step closer to world domination.