ONE MONTH>ONE MONTH>ONE MONTH>ONE MONTH>ONE MONTH
now you can't say we haven't warned you!
Get off your ass and make some porn people!!
Yes, its our official 'Call for Entries' for our sixth year of sexy and empowering bicycle film programming.
Illustration by Son of Son |
You would think after 5 years we would have seen just about everything to do with bikes and sex, and be satisfied! Yet, this could not be further from the truth! Our chains are still lubed and waiting to be pumped full of the awesome power of DIY transportation and pornography!
We had some excellent entries over the past years, ranging everywhere from 'fall off your bike' hilariousness to 'fall off your bike' horniness. Including some great international entries we received while enacting our world domination plan in Europe! Our community of radical bike-sexuals has proven many times over that they are smart, funny and aware! We are so grateful for every submission we have received in the past, and we are over-joyed to continue share great art with other like-minded individuals, the world over!
We have some really exciting plans for the future of Bike Smut, but they won't be possible without your contributions. Maybe you saw the movies and were inspired. Or maybe you saw the movies and were unimpressed. Maybe you didn't see the movies, but want to ensure you don't miss it next time round. (The best way to get us to come to our town is by making a movie!) Maybe you are a cyclist who wants to inspire your friends to be more open about sex, or introduce your pervy/kinky friends to the wonderful empowerment of the bicycle. Maybe you just like bikes and sex. It can be that simple!!
Europe, we are talking to you! The success of our first ever European tour will be measured by how many great movies we get from YOU! It will also determine our return. You want more?? Show us what you got.
Steps to making your bike porn happen:
- Get an idea! What do you like about bikes and sex? This years theme is 'Turning Trixxx'. What does that mean to you? Sex workers doing bar spins? Obtaining coitus on a bike whilst riding it? (Actually no, no one has done that before!! WTF!?) We are not too strict on our themes. So, whatever your idea, make it sexy, make it clever, make it awesome. Just make bike porn!!!
- Find a friend(s). It is possible to make a totally solo and totally great bike porn. But even if you and your bike are the only 'actors' its great to have a few more people on board. Camera operators are handy and make it easier to get better shots. Musicians can be great for providing sexy backing music. More people means more ideas, which can lead to really really great art. This project is all about community, so get your community involved in a great project!
- Get a camera. (What, that cell phone shoots video??) We dont care how you shoot it. Just find a way to get it in some shareable format. Cameras are everywhere these days. Shoot in super 8, shoot in HD, string a bunch of still images together from your iphone. We prefer 16x9 ratio, but if you wanna shoot in pixelsvison or some other crazy format, we are ok with that.
- Make your movie. Lights, camera, action as they say. Once you get it all recorded you are going to want to try your hand at some editing. Sharing ideas works best when they are quick and concise. Keep it under 10 mins (we think 5 mins and under is even better!) and the audience is more likely to stay engaged and understand what you are trying to say. That also keeps our show to one evening long, rather than an all night marathon of bike porn.
- Fill out the 'Entry Form.' I know, i know...paperwork!!!??! It's a boring part of the biz, but we gotta do it. We kept it as short as possible, and it's a little more work for you that means A LOT less work for us. You can get your copy from HERE. If you have questions, send us an email.
- Get your movie in our hands by May 6th! Once you have the entry form you will also know how to send us your movie. Once we have it, we promise not to put it online, release a DVD or tell your grandma.
Just in case you didn't get that before.
You make it possible for bikers to talk about sex, you make it
possible for sex fiends to enjoy biking, you make your community
stronger and more aware. You share these things with people you care
about because it improves their lives. All you have to do is make a movie.
P.S. We have some super sweet posters and postcards for our 'call for entries', featuring the beautiful art above. If you work in a bookstore, bike shop, bordello or some similar community space that might want to share these ideas in poster/postcard format, please get in touch. bikesmut@gmail.com
Have fun, play safe, make porn!
That poster is hideous, sexist, and make me want to slam my U-lock into the faces of the pornsick pricks who thought it up and put it inplaces where I don't have the CHOICE not to see dignity-mocking cartoon of two women wearing lipstick on their vulvas while they get object rammed up their rectums.
ReplyDeleteShove your predicatible rejoinder of "butbutbut our token woman spokeslut loves it!" up your diseased dingaling dickholes. See you soon with a handful of roofing tacks...
roofing tacks? another BDSM wannabe is making nice with our comments section.
ReplyDeleteIs it a U-lock, I thought it was a rainbow. Like the sun and rain shines out of our badass lady asses...I guess it all depends on how you choose to interpret it, eh
ReplyDelete