May 24, 2009

expanded hot pepper coverage

Really the "hot pepper coverage" is just marketing... it's like Ned Flanders said, "this 4-alarm fire is probably only 2 alarm at best". But still there could be a great unspoken outcry for more shots of the boys in blue wearing yellow, and so here is:

Many thoughts come to mind as we gaze intently at this image

Does Portland having less critical mass = less time for cops to ride bikes = more fat cops? Are cops in NYC getting healthier because of their increased presence at Critical Mass? DUDE! COULD NYC BIKE COPS TAKE PDX BIKE COPS?!?

Perhaps the Portland Police Union step up its efforts to get Critical Mass popular again. There are a number of benefits including lots of easy overtime for officers with reduced health care benefits for the system overall.

This couldn't happen at a more important time. Presently our team of bikesexuals are gearing up to ride in what could be North America's best Critical Mass:
  • Best in that it is huge! It has rides in the thousands, which is way more than ride in Portland (at least with their clothes on).
  • Best in that it is full of creativity! This month is pirate themed and the ride will be heading to our final screening of Bikexploitation and a massive pirate party with peepshows and lots of excellent performers.
  • Best in that they have a low # of arrests per rider attending. Fun in the street and fewer body checks than either NYC or PDX.

All this makes us wonder if perhaps Bike Porn Industries could see a new sponsor latter this summer. Hey, Police Union President Sgt. Scott Westerman, take heed, we need more sexy cops! Everyone knows cops and porn go together like...

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