Taste Testers Agree: It Needs More Porn

Oh internet, you are so full of humor, sex, intrigue, insight, and disturbing as fuck images.

So many people have been curious about the content of Bike Porn 3: CYCLE BOUND that we felt it prudent to explain how not to make a sexy bike movie:

• make it too long
• make it too confusing (for too long)
• make it with out personality
• make it with people wearing lots of clothes
• make it about the wrong kind of bikes
  
• make it sans sexuality
  

Now there are some movies that are on their way, but they may need some help. For example:
Impressive for sure but what about bears doing track stands?
This fashion show is just a rad bike trick away
If your actors are siting around wondering "what next" than so are we

Moreover the possibilities for traditionally nonsexy things to get us hot and bothered should be explored, not shunned. Bike laws as porn?

How about a sexy traffic "law"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smeed%27s_law

Can you prove that information is sexy? That the brain is one big soft-gray-matter-hard-on?

kinda like this only with more bikes and less turkey

you have only one month left before the really frigging last min deadline ends your opportunity to SUBMIT... perhaps forever. DONT BE A JERK! instead jerk to the beat, and create fanfuckingtastic works of sexy bike art, today.

* In fairness, we are not explicitly against internal combustion engines, more that we are opposed to what they have done/continue to do. Freedom can come in many forms, and so can prison. We are, however, ready to square off with any mofo who tells us that twisting wrist is sexier than rocking your ride.