GDL Te Quieren!

Que quieren que bajar! Nos amig@s en La Casa PUC tienen muchas bebidas y encantan bicis!

 

Vamanos a 19:00 para bebidas, discucion, y pre-show videos!
Epazamos  a 20:00!

Agustin de la Rosa 616

 

DISFRUTE PORNO!

Bikini Bike Wash

Bike Smut is proud to announce we are sponsoring an afternoon of cleanliness.

The Bikini Bike Wash is a fundraiser for Portland's 2013 World Naked Bike Ride!

Friday August 17th
Burgerville parking lot
Southeast 12th and Hawthorne
4pm to 8pm
Facial Book

Why does the WNBR cost so much money? Well for the first 5 or so years it was run successfully with almost no money to support it, just a dozen or so volunteers who gave their time to the em-betterment of the city.

But since then our naked members have swollen in size! There are thousands of people who attend each year! All those people will need a location to gather. The permits, the bathroom, the negoations with police and fire... its all an impressive amount of work and it is still all volunteer driven.

We would love to be able to ask the 1000s of naked bikers who show up to each give a dollar or two and then we would be able to cover our costs completly, but if you have never asked someone without clothes for money its a somewhat humorous situation. No clothes means no pockets and no pockets means no where to put any money!

This is your call to help support this fantastic event! If you want to help us by either being a scantily clad washer of bikes, if you have a donation of rags, sponges, cassette cleaning tools and the like please get in touch with us! bikesmut@gmail.com

split ends make means

Over the past few years hardly a show has gone by that someone didn't tell us they were terribly bothered by the content. It is a source of pride that we have consistently shaken so many otherwise unmoved people.

Well it is one thing to hate on a curator when you watch 90 min of sweet bike sex when you were expecting to see just pictures of bikes (yup it happens). But what about hating on thy neighbor?

This article about a DC bicycle and porn shop makes lots of sense to us, but we might be biased.

So many questions sprint up.

Why is gay porn twice as expensive as straight porn? We fear the day when all porn is gone from the gritty streets and the only way to get off is to log on. Don't tell us not to hate the internet! For that hate is a joy beyond measure.

Our fingers are crossed that there is a nonprofit out there archiving all the best porn so that after the apocalypse when the connections are all down and all we have is an old VHS player we are still able to kick it with ease.

Aspiring entrepreneurs. Don't let this idea fall by the wayside. Start hoarding porn today and tomorrow we might still get a long. Actually we hope for many longs ideally.

Leave it to the professionals

I am back from an exciting tour of the Southwest. Thanks to the lovely people of Durango Colorado we enjoyed some movie priemeres, grass bike polo, death defying mt biking, hordes of beer, wine (like 20 cases)... I won the a sweet DFL prize for actually completing the race, and as of yet no one killed dabby... yet. Check some pictures at the Team WRECK blog

I returned home from my travels to find that a Scottish man was caught fucking his bicycle in a hotel room was found guilty and now is a registered sex offender.

This is the kind of news story that forces us to take a step back and ponder the future of bike humping.

Do the health benefits of an active bikesexual lifestyle make up for the potential danger and embarrassment of being caught in the act? Imagine having to go around to all the houses in your neighborhood saying, "Hi. I am a sexual predator. I was caught humping a bicycle, so you should probably not leave your pretty young Bianchi laying around on your front yard... for it's safety."

Perhaps we should organize a fundraiser for this poor, misunderstood, oversexed person. He may represent a desire that most of us are too fearful to admit or explore. But what is the appropriate response?

• A bicycle kiss-in outside the jailhouse
• A series of signed pictures of bikes with genitalia sent to the hotel
• A sicker campaign like: "I fuck bikes and I vote" or "Robert Stewart does it between the tubes"
• A new nonprofit formed to maintain the right of sentient beings to be able to fuck any inanimate object they desire

Perhaps the best course of action would be to make an instructional brochure with some guidelines to help future Robert Stewarts avoid being caught?

• Do not trust a lock that you do not have the only key to.
• Consider moving large physical barriers to prevent access.
• When a maid asks if anyone is in the room, yell "Go away!"

Perhaps the only truly safe bet is to make it official and marry your bike. Be sure to have paperwork on hand, or stuff it into the seat tube, although you might want to laminate it first.


Which places are appropriate and which are deviant?