Where Vermont meets New Hamptire

At the junction of the Connecticut River, the Mascoma River and the White River is town called White River Junction. That is the next stop for Bike Smut!

Our last visit to WRJ was 7 years ago! Since we make an original 90-min program each year that's a lot of porn to choose from. What rare gems will we unearth for the unsuspecting denizens of this sleepy berg?

We have some pretty sexy bikes in some very sexy videos... a scant few are from Italy, where they really know a thing or two about bike porn!

There's also a few from the southwest, Beaus and Arrows shows women hunting for their bikesexual partners...

Then from Montreal, we have Brazen Saddles... an all fem bikepunx gang traps a queer bike cop and punish them with handcuffs and bike tube floggers.

or the immensely popular, Derailed, where professional porn star, Sebastian Keys shows Johnny Utah the importance of proper tension in your bike repairs!

Plus we get to make a special performance! We have so many! What a delightful choice to have available!!

Its a great problem to have and as many of you know, we are all about having better problems!

Wednesday August 31

Main St Museum

58 Bridge St. White River Junction

6:30-doors

7-8pm presentations and opening

8pm - films

End - performance

http://www.mainstreetmuseum.org/event-calendar/bike-porn/ 

We will have a presentation from Dr. Victoria Hartmann, director of the Sex Museum in Las Vegas 

Feel the chill... the empty void without bike porn... Burlington

Following an amazing show in Boston, Bike Smut is getting ready to press on to the rest of the lucky parts of New England, Canada, the Rust Belt and Great Lakes. First up Burlington, Vermont!

We are fortunate the amazing venue, Arts Riot has played host to Bike Smut for the past 3 years. They have the space and equipment to make a show that lights a fire under the mostly mild-mannered butts of Vermont's capital city. Plus we have some really exciting local artists who are making some excellent live performance too!

the first time we blended enthuistically

Featuring: Songbird, Lauren Lauren Larken and Dj Beet Pilgrim, Steve Scuderi

This little blurb is a big part of why we are so excited Larken is partnering up with Bike Smut... again:

Larken creates art campaigns that initiate crucial dialog about gender issues and community building. As a founder of HollabackNYC and Radical Performance Group, she has designed, created, and performed on behalf of community groups such as The Alliance Against Sexual Assault, Times UP!, and Freegan Info. Intended to supplement her Danish Fulbright application, this short piece shows her using an interactive artistic approach to complex social issues, making activism fun, free and sexy.

 SO HAWT!

Plus one of the best writers that ever published an article that right is now working at the local weekly, 7 Days, which we assume will have people dancing in the streets!

blame this photo on Times Up, NYC

Get your advance tickets now and save 30% off the door!

Bike Smut 9: Science Friction
Thursday, Aug 25
Arts Riot - 400 Pine St
7:30 Doors
8:00 Show
$6 presale | $9 Day of
With Live Performance
ADULTS ONLY

http://sevendaystickets.com/events/35062788/bike-smut-9-science-friction-the-final-new-england-tour-or-something

So how much do we love New England? A BurlingTON!

THATS IT! MY LAST VERMOUNT JOKE! I WILL MOCK THIS NEW ENGLAND TOWN NO MORE FOREVER!

Come Again, Burlington!

This is normally where we make a humorous quip about the city or state hosting Bike Smut, usually involving their name, or motto into some sort of play on words.

In the past we've said, VerMOUNT (as in, to see you get on) and I think we also tried a Voldermount joke once, although its hard to out-parody the self-referential internet. Burrrrrlington made more sense when we came through a snow storm 4 years ago.  But none of those are popping and we are only into the freshest recycled humor.

So fuck it, we have a show at Arts Riot, a totally excellent space in Burlington, Vermont and we are stoked about it! Plus we are donating part of the door to Pride VT, who on top of throwing a great festival celebrating the joy of sexuality, also encourage the responsibility of healthy behaviors to keep you safe!

Bike Smut 8: Come Again
Wednesday, May 6
Arts Riot
400 Pine St, Burlington, VT
9pm - $5 advance tickets

hey! don't forget to put on some shoes, those pedals will tear your sensitive feets!

If you are gonna wave your wand around like that it might as well be used to fuck the patriarchy... Like Hermone, "the girl who gave literally zero fucks".

Riding Across Your Border

Soon we return to the good old (possibly even not bankrupt) United States. One country down, two more to go and this northern half of the hemisphere is done! (Assuming you don't count the other 20 countries in North America... Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, is that a fucking band?  Oh actually, it is)

We have more smiles, joy, oral health pamphlets and porn to deliver as The Porny Express rides on!

No use crying

Burlington, Vermont
Monday, October 21st
Arts Riot
400 Pine St
8pm
Adults Only

Sponsored by RU12? ("Are You One Too?" for the tracially unhip) Testing, Educating and Celebrating sexuality with all of Vermont! photo credit

Pappas got a brand New England bag!

We have reached the Bikesexual zenith! At least in a northeast geo-political sense. We will be able to explore any more Canadian Providences on this Tour de TriXXX. Thank you Toronto, Ottawa and Montreal. We hope our joyful expressions of bikesexuality will keep you warm all winter long.

But we may linger no longer. Today we turn South and begin the long, hard and sometimes throbbing road down to Mexico.

Tonight (Thursday the 18th)!  return to the US to run old glory up and down the pole. (if ya know what im sayin)

Burlington 

Thu Oct 18
The Firefly
200 main st. Burlington, vt
doors at 8pm
$5    18+  

Hey Paul, Forget the embarrassment of what happened when you put your sex tape online. There is no shame going on here. You can ride through every town, middle-sex and farm screaming "the pornographers are coming!" and no one will thing anything less of you for expressing your desires. Tomorrow (Friday the 19th) we travel to the original American capital of radical behavior:  

BOSTON!

The Video Underground

385 Centre Street

3 shows @ 7:30 9:15 and 11pm

$5  +18

 

Spread your legs and ride, we don't get no break! As long as there is a place where the fun is not between our legs we must strive to bring more joy and liberation to sex and transportation! The next day (Saturday the 20th) we press on to the smallest US state, Rhode Island, where we will decree ourselves sovereign, sexy and self powered in

Providence!

Dungeon C in Olneyville

underground show, email libertalia401@gmail.com for address

9pm    

$7 - no one turned away    adults only

The day after (Sunday the 21st) is kept sacred. If its porno, its polo, and if its not polo is some other ball and if we are playing with balls you are probably invited. We shall not travel further than necessary to deliver this powerful scripture of self-determined boundaries on obscenity. Not having to go to another city is almost a break because we are doing a second screening in

Providence!

Libertalia    

280 Broadway Room 200    

6pm    

$7  - no one turned away    adults only

Whew! That's a lot of New England packed into 4-day weekend. Join us! Share us! Rejoice!

Turning TriXXX in Burlington

We are coming back home!

Well not our home exactly, Canada feels more like Cascadia than the rest of the United States, but if we are gonna have certain inaliable rights somewhere it might as well be here. Besides US citizens probably need more bikesexual liberation than just about any other people in the non-pornographer-beheading world.

Plus, Vermont might just be the closest thing to Oregon on the east coast! Sure Maine has the original Portland, but there loads of ways OR and VT stand out. Politics: lefist, laissez-faire... well these terms probably don't mean much because so many ideas have become twisted so many ways. But nonetheless Burlington is directly south of Montreal, we are going to stop, drop (some porn) and roll (out afterward).

Shaking bones at the Old Spokes Home

Thu Oct 18
The Firefly
200 main st. Burlington, vt
doors at 8pm 
$5    18+  

We hear there is a ride beforehand! Stay tuned!

Yes! We are home! Makes ya wanna sing something uplifting!

I'M PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN WHERE AT LEAST I KNOW... hrm what was that about suspending habius corpus and indefinitely detaining people without a trail?

Something unconstatuti-something...

New HUMPshire and VerMOUNT

Thanks so much to our great hosts in Providence and Boston! Who knew that fun loving bikers would be so much fun, even in historically puritanical, witch-burning MA? Alas, the harsh mistress that is the Backlash Tour has us enjoying but one more day in New England.

Like delicate fingers tracing a finely crafted handmade frame, so to are we creeping up the Atlantic coast, tickling the virtual base of America's headtube in Vermont and we are straddling the border to New Humpshire! (possibly fingering the lugs!) Soon we will be cresting around the big east coast Canadian biking cities of Ottawa, Montreal and Toronto... But first WHITE RIVER JUNCTION!

• Bike Porn 3: Cycle Bound
• Thursday, April 22st
• Main St Museum
• 58 Bridge St,
• 7:30 doors, 8pm start
• $5 18+ byo delicious refreshments - share with other sexy bikers!

Then in Canada we hope that our hosts will provide unto us, a bike ride, polo (maybe a few times), more riding and lots of great people visiting from all over to make magic happen!


Photo credit to Courtney Rodgers

Riding hard in Rhode Island

Behold our third night in our 3rd state. It gets like that in New England, where as opposed to the large city-states of the pre-industrial ages, these states are small enough that they could be described as state-cities.

We make our way to Providence, Rhode Island!

Providence, the word itself so exciting: A distinction is usually made between "general providence" which refers to God's continuous upholding the existence and natural order of the universe, and "special providence" which refers to God's extraordinary intervention in the life of people.^[1]

While we don't claim to be divine (well some of us on tour do, but not all of us) we do this this is a pretty extraordinary thing going on... the ONLY screening in Rhode Island!

Alas we are not publicizing the location of the event due to concerns of annoying, state-sponsored terrorism coming and shutting us down. So we are going into the Bike Porn underground!

• Bike Porn 3: Cycle Bound
• 4/19/2010 Providence
• 17 Mule
• 8pm $5 donation adults only
• A bike ride to the secret location meets at 6pm at Kennedy Plaza
• NEW! A "fuck bikes, pedestrians-only!" walk. Gather at everyone's favorite Mexican restaurant... La Lupita @ 1950 Westminster Street at 8:00pm. The ambulation begins promptly at 8:15pm
  

If you are totally not hip (like us, it seems) and have never been to 17 Mule before, just join us on the ride, or on the walk, or give a phone TEXT to the new improved Providence Bike Porn Hotline for location details:

401-954-6225

Did you catch that, this is now a text only number, suck it lan liners!

Tremendous thanks go out the the excellent Chainbreaker's Collective who did a fabulous job organizing our show in New Haven. Great venue, audience, a place for us to crash... everything!

Check out the great informative description (which, alas makes up 60% of all the content on their website):

The Chainbreakers is a New Haven collective made up of women, transgendered, and intersex cyclists actively building feminist bicycle culture in New Haven. The group gets together monthly to work on bikes and share skills, food, and time. Chainbreakers is based on the belief that working on your own form of transportation is empowering and fun, and it provides a positive alternative to male-dominated bike culture.

Pretty fucking cool eh? To the straight dudes who might take offense... if you want more women on bikes this is the kind of radical organization that could make your culture less of a sausage fest all the time.


Photo Credit to Courtney Rodgers