Until it Burns, Chicago

Chicago, the 3rd city of these United States and the 1st place to inspire a riot during Bike Smut.

Its not everyday that the audience, due to vast intoxication, could belligerently necessitate stopping the screening. In fact its only happened a few times, but never with as much gusto as it was that cold March night at the historic Music Box in 2008. Screenings since then have come in all manners of flavor. We had our second show further west at a now defunct venue called Reversible Eye Gallery A two-person birthday party resulted in a back-to-back knocktapus (that's a four pairs of boobs slapping your in the face while your hands are behind your back... in case you didn't know) The stressful last min changes to the screen and projector at the Viaduct Theater at part of the Backlash Tour resulted in a enthralled audience. A return to the Music Box in 2011 was moderately successful with lots of sponsors but the massive venue was deemed just too large for our niche audience.

Finally after a few years of trying we were able to make a screening happen at Co-prosperity Sphere, and it was grand! We came back to do it again last year in conjunction with the WNBR and lots of local artists but while it seemed promising the record breaking rainfall was less than accommodating. Plus there was a shooting around the corner. Its a big city, these things happen.

Now we return for our final Chicago show, bringing thoughtful repose and levity to the people with performance and porn.

Sunday October 9th
Township
2200 N. California
7:30 pm doors
8:15 pm show$9 no one turned away for lack of funds
FB event

ONLY THREE SCREENINGS REMAIN!

THE LAST SMUTTY DANCE IN TORONTO

We are fresh out of Harvest Festival, the electro-dance filled forest 300 km north of Toronto. We partied, we made silly, we worked with our local host to fabricate a pedal-powered disco... and we showed some classic bicycle pornography to some hippies in the woods. Now its time to get deep into Canada's most popular city for our last ever screening here!

The first show we ever did was at Cine Cycle and, honest to mercy, it included some locally made, live-action tentacle porn.

this is not from that show but gawd we love Huebucket's work

The following year we were treated to some bicycle bondage as our hosts proceeded to tie up and suspend $15,000 worth of bikes that made as art, never to be ridden. Plus a dance party that raged past dawn. Stunning.

Our 5th year was half consumed by our first European tour, the other half we were driving back along the southern border on The Orgasm Trail (because the south didn't get the 4th year)

We returned to Cine Cycle for Bike Smut 6: Turning Trixxx, which included our first collaboration from the amazing sex-positive store, Good For Her. On top of providing excellent body-positive support to those exploring sexuality they also organize the Feminist Porn Awards, which are on sabbatical at the moment, likely for similar reasons that Bike Smut is retiring... when you hold yourself to such high standards its difficult to maintain a pristine track record, and as they say, no good deed goes unpunished.

The following year was a somewhat stressful ride from Buffalo that included an emergency repair of our hand-built trailer.   There was some serious biker cred back in those days. Yeesh!

Last year we upped-the-punx with a collaboration with Soy Bomb housing coop and the Welcome to Toronto art collective.  Fabulous art was made and distributed and the party was a massive success.

This year we return to our Toronto roots. Back with the crazy old British bike mechanic who loves independent film and dirty jokes. Come on down and wish us farewell as we dance the night away!



Thursday September 22 
CineCycle 129 Spadina Avenue (in the Coach house in the Alley)
7:30 pm doors
8:15 pm show
9:30 pm afterparty private FB event

LIVE ENTERTAINMENT! with Mineta and 3 DJs!
FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY!!

ADULT DRINKS!
ADULT TALKS!
ADULT FILMS!
ADULTS DANCING!

au revior, Montreal

Montreal, we are ending this Francophilic relationship!

Well, more like we hope all you french-friendly folk will come visit us for a change as this Saturday is the LAST EVER screening in Montreal.

Lets take a moment to think back to some of the highlights of the past several episodes in Quebec.

Fleshback to the first time Bike Smut played in MTL we opened for a play party we a variety of sexual acts happening all over. Dubious that Interstice still exists but it was in Griffintown and it was amazing. Naturally there are not many photos but they did send us this a few days later.

We came back to Montreal to bring Bike Smut 4:PLAY to a place called Death Church in Verdun a year later. It really was an old church that had been refurbished to produce a more METAL experience. Go figure, the capital city of North America has more churches than it knows what to do with. It was a good screening from the crusty punks who had a variety of sex toys made from bike parts. That was our first experience with DIY Montreal poutine: buy a big bag of curds direct from a farm, then get your fries and gravy sourced from the local corner store.

Our break out show in Montreal was Bike Smut 6: Turning Trixxx. We had a lot of investment and the larger bike community finally got to put the pieces together. This was our first time in Café L'Artère, coopérative de solidarité

The talented performers of Solar Year set the mood before our show started:


Miss Poppy Cox was speaking immensely adorable (and pretty accurate) French to the crowd:

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Then the following year our fabulous hosts brought us to a historic strip club, Cafe Cleopatra. The debauchery was on and the dancing was good. This marked the north-easternmost corner of the Porny Express bike tour. Reverend Phil rode through the encroaching winter with the addition of bike tube gaskets, a cheap and easy way to keep the muck out of your bearings. Whew! With as dirty as we get it was a welcome addition.

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We returned to Cleopatra for "Come Again" when we showed the full version of Brazen Saddles, one of the most ambitious films produced for Bike Smut. Bringing together the entire community. With lots of exploration and tension, a biker gang being chased by a bike cop laid a trap then they decided to really Fuck the Police... consensually! This was extra meaningful because our event took place over May Day so the revolutionaries were out in the streets.

You can just see the gas canisters being shot at the crowd from the Police in the distance

after the police added gas there was a lot of chaos

which resulted in 1000s of people scattered across the streets

Those amazing handmade vests that were featured in Brazen Saddles (learn more about this fab film here) were created within the Montreal Biker community. We got to see some behind the scenes creations of Oxyd Creations. If you know a badass biker you want to get one of these handmade vests; if you want more pegging start with a harness that looks good and feels good! We wrote about their fresh bikesexual wear last year and we are excited to have them vending with Bike Smut again this year!

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Now we go back to Café L'Artère and have a lot of exciting times planned. Stay tuned for more details on presentations, performers, DJs, discounts for entry, and extra fun we are working to having with you!

Saturday, September 10

Café L'Artère

7000 Avenue du Parc

8pm presentations

9pm cinema

11pm dance

Where Vermont meets New Hamptire

At the junction of the Connecticut River, the Mascoma River and the White River is town called White River Junction. That is the next stop for Bike Smut!

Our last visit to WRJ was 7 years ago! Since we make an original 90-min program each year that's a lot of porn to choose from. What rare gems will we unearth for the unsuspecting denizens of this sleepy berg?

We have some pretty sexy bikes in some very sexy videos... a scant few are from Italy, where they really know a thing or two about bike porn!

There's also a few from the southwest, Beaus and Arrows shows women hunting for their bikesexual partners...

Then from Montreal, we have Brazen Saddles... an all fem bikepunx gang traps a queer bike cop and punish them with handcuffs and bike tube floggers.

or the immensely popular, Derailed, where professional porn star, Sebastian Keys shows Johnny Utah the importance of proper tension in your bike repairs!

Plus we get to make a special performance! We have so many! What a delightful choice to have available!!

Its a great problem to have and as many of you know, we are all about having better problems!

Wednesday August 31

Main St Museum

58 Bridge St. White River Junction

6:30-doors

7-8pm presentations and opening

8pm - films

End - performance

http://www.mainstreetmuseum.org/event-calendar/bike-porn/ 

We will have a presentation from Dr. Victoria Hartmann, director of the Sex Museum in Las Vegas 

Bikesexual Boston: The End is Neigh

It is fitting that our final US/Canadian tour begins in the original cultural capitol of the United States. Boston has seen Bike Smut at its dazzling highs and depressing lows.

Along the way we have been blessed to have excellent help. Igniting the bikesexual revolution was a pair of local bicycle-fun activists we had met in Portland, Sara and Jamie.  Jamie would help connect the dots in various cities as she traveled the world; Sara would go on to organize Boston's World Naked Bike Ride and provided much needed comforts that are so rare when on the road.

The gender-queer dynamo, Aliza of Truth Serum.org provided unparalleled marketing power. We sold out The Brattle Theater on our very first screening! Richard Meek and a photographer Derek Kouyoumjian from The Boston Phoenix promoted and documented the extraordinary presentation of "Bike Smut 3: Cycle Bound" Ending with a live song and dance performance parody of Dirty Dancing's "The BikePorn of My Life" with a 3-person, full-Monty burlesque and stirringly infectious sing along at the end.

Whew. Hard act to follow.

That was 6 years ago, and a lot has changed. Touring with a team of radical queers is both as exhilarating and painful as it sounds. Then we learned our promotional powerhose Aliza had suffered a major accident that would leave her brain hemorrhaging and needing multiple surgeries to save her life. They survived but the damage had been done. The torrent of words that had once flowed from Aliza with such speed and clarity were severely debilitated. Truth Serum and the community of people who depended on it to provide access to quality gender-bending art were in limbo.

After trying for many years to recapture the magic without Aliz'a help Bike Smut had to rebuild.  Rev.Phil decided to bike tour with Bike Smut as a challenge to see if he could "walk the walk." He bike toured across AND around North America, presenting Bike Smut 7: The Porny Express in dozens of cities, riding thousands of miles from Minneapolis to Montreal to Mexico with all the necessary gear that used to fill a van.

Bike Smut found a comfort in more intimate venues. Teaming up with a tall glass of smart water, the typically-Boston-brilliant, bike punk, Q helped us secure and fill an underground venue space. It was packed with our fav kind of audience, curious and vocal perverts! They had excellent questions making an engaging Q and A session followed by a strip down naked-style dance party!  It was supremely rewarding to have some of our favorite organizers and filmmakers at that show, especially because we had worked hard on promoting Bike Smut and we all want it to fulfill that potential promise of being the catalyst for joyous celebration of our liberty and sexuality in motion. It was no small feet for Aliza to get up the 7 flights of stairs nor stick it out to the end as such an engaging show can be overwhelmingly taxing even to healthy grey matter. Brain damage is a real thing and healing from it takes a lot of patient work. We are exceedingly grateful to the community of people who have and continue to support Aliza. Thank you!

Last year we were delighted to find Aliza was starting to organize events again, this time creating space for people to create their own art while challenging taboos at Dr Sketchy's! Sara and Rev.Phil took the opportunity to be models for Dr Sketchy before the screening of Bike Smut 8: Come Again. More exciting performances and a rapt audience. More photos from Aliza.

Which brings us to today. This week we will present Bike Smut 9: Science Friction, our final screening in Boston. We have a series of movies and performances based on the theme including: interracial alien orgies, power-tool wielding lesbians, Mexican post-porn saddle squirting, polybikesexual queer trans babes armed with dildo flamethrowers, hunting for a mate in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and time traveling sex missionaries!

But before that we have a special event where Reverend Phil will make a rare powerpoint presentation called:

BIKESEXUAL REVELATIONS:  

 A DECADE OF DECADENCE IN 45 MINUTES

HOW I LEARNED TO STOP BULLSHIT PATRIARCHY AND LOVE RADICAL INTERDEPENDENCE

Its gonna be amazing!

Both events are hosted at Aeronaut Brewing Company  at 14 Tyler Street Somerville, MA

Wednesday, Aug 3rd
5pm bike workshop with SHIFT bike collective
6:30 Ken Smith of Rejjee explores safe, consensual BDSM with your bike by locking it up in public
7:15pm Bikesexual Revelations
FB event





Sunday, August 7
8:15pm, Adults Only, $9 donation
Live Performances
ONE NIGHT ONLY
FB event

Following this event we have screenings in New Haven, Troy, Burlington, White River Junction, Montreal, Toronto, Buffalo, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Peoria, Chicago, Milwaukee, Madison, and Minneapolis. Please connect us with other people along the way!


We need help finding people and venues in other New England towns. Help Providence, Northampton and Portland, Maine discover their bikesexuality!



Pics from Bike Smut 3: Cycle Bound by Derek Kouyoumjian, Tom Meek and The Boston Phoenix

Colorado BikeSexual Conclusion

Bike Smut has been visiting Colorado since our first year and every city (Denver, Boulder, Ft Collins and Colorado Springs) has been good and/or challenging to Bike Smut from year to year. For example during our very visit to Denver, Gabe, our bravest tourista was riding his customized minibike on the extra slippery skate park and in a terrifyingly casual, comical slip and crash he broke his femur at the hip. Thinking he had dislocated his hip he requested we try and yank his leg back into place. For hours we tore at his body, Lost Jeff on his arms and RevPhil at his feet, pulling with all out might and ripping his body to shreds as the bone cut and pinched the inflamed area around his broken leg bone.

Sexy!

This surface is too safe to walk on, much less bike on

After it started to snow the skateboarders began to heckle us to call a fucking ambulance already. We, the survivors rode along the rive bike path to meet him at the the hospital where we found a car had flipped over the embankment, causing a traffic jam and stalling the ambulance.

Ironic!

In our second year we let the locals take the beating. A BDSM trio pierced and hung cogs and other bike parts from a young bearded man with nice tattoos. Then one girl held him while the other beat him lovingly/savagely with tubes, tires, tools and a heavy and immensely painful brake cable flogger.

Sexy!

Just before we took part in a "desa-crat" obscene-poses-with-public-art-photo-scavenger bike race. I think we were "extra winners."

Hilarious!

"Tea-Bagging the broom is OK"

Year three we were facing a freezing snow storm and also overlapping with our not so smutty rivals, the Bicycle Film Festival

Frigid!

But our team of artists manipulated some of their posters and a local volunteered to be bound and suspended during the show.

Sexy!

And so it continued up until last year when an excellent local journalist wrote a story about us for Vice Magazine. Now we are in our 9th and final time in Colorado and although in the EIGHT prior years we never received a single submission from Colorado this year we have not one, not two BUT THREE separate films from Denver artists! In short means this is gonna be one of the best shows and parties of the year.

Sunday November 8
Voodoo Comedy Playhouse
1260 22nd Street
7 & 9 pm - TWO SHOWS!
Tickets are available now $8 advance, $10 at door
Live performances from Reecy Pontiff, a team of solid gold roller skaters, and the dorkiest, SciFi choke-out or make-out battle of all time! 
Limited Seating, 18+, FB event



ONE NIGHT ONLY! FREE PRIZES!

Venue theater, bar, and restrooms are all wheelchair accessible and located on the 1st floor.
Please contact any of the hosts directly with private questions, needs, or concerns.

 but that's not all.

FRIDAY NIGHT BIKESEXUAL ALLEYCAT RACE 

• 6pm Registration will be at Governor's Park (8th and Logan) s
• 7pm Race start!
• Prizes will be awarded to Most Overall Points, First Women, First Men, and Best Costume.
• $5 to enter. No bag or lock required but you will need a camera!
• After party shenanigans with a keg of New Belgium beer.
• ALL BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU! 

 

Tuesday Nov 10th at the Lyric Cinema in Ft. Collins 


Photos (above) via Gabriel Amadeus and Josh Neverfindme
Stills (below) from Do Bicycle Dream of Electric Humans, The Purple Ladies and Orgasmatronics