June 29, 2012

More Naked Media VI


The videos keep coming! Here is a nice long view of Portland's Naked Bike Ride as it crossed the Burnside Bridge and came up to Sandy Blvd. 100s of naked bodies pass in only a couple minutes.

 

 Reverend Phil asks "Why? Why is it so popular to engage in this spectacle?" If you have any thoughts on the topic please leave them below.

A tribute to Sapphic Bike Love

Today is the day! We have toiled for countless hours, suffered a half dozen hard drive failures, twisted chains, got covered in grease and that was just the foreplay.

But none of that compares to what the filmmakers have done to make it so that we could present these movies to you!

Tonight we get to share all our hard work of traveling and expressing our commitment to the joy and liberation that come with sex and cycling. And damn are we ever excited to bring it!

Here is an almost SFW taste!



Exciting!

Bike Smut 6: Turning TriXXX 
Friday June 29 
Clinton St Theater (26th and SE Clinton) 
at 9 and 11pm 
$7 (half price tickets available for the 11pm show for a few more hours!)

June 28, 2012

After Party People

One might think it is foolishly arrogent to plan for a sweet after party days before the party has even started. What is the point of the afterparty, but the sweet excitement of having loads of people who unamiously agree, "This feeling must not end!"


That's what a world premiere is like. No one in the audience has a clue what is about to come next and that thrill and mystery builds the anticipation to another level. With the most graphic program we have ever curated and excellent sponsors who can offer you:






When it is all over what will you do? Dance? Drink? Fuck? All of the above in the streets? Oh, the tyranny of choice! It is understandable that you might be suffering from some anxiety due simply to the  head-spinning caused by the possibility of so much fun!!

Let us solve your dilemma (slightly) with one more sponsor
Shift (free bike fun)



MULTHNOMAH COUNTY BIKE FAIR
Saturday, June 30th @ 2pm be at SE 12th and Alder 
in sunny Portland, fucking Cascadia!
Your home for kickass, DIY, older-than-Pedalpalooza free-fun times!


Join us for something a little different. A few hundred of your friends and strangers gathered to listen to music, compete in races, watch tall bike jousting, and plenty of good old fashioned DIY bike fun!


Wasthat?? You think 2pm the following day does not count as an afterparty?  Well we think it doesn't matter when  you start partying, it matters when you stop! The power is in you! 
yea captin, prob some energy drinks too!

June 27, 2012

More Naked Media V



Music by Love Bomb Go Go

Words by Steph

Bodies by naked bikers of Cascadia

Joy by Shift2Bikes



Tomorrow we will have a much longer and more satisfying video for your carnal viewing pleasure.

June 26, 2012

More Naked Media IV

Something was screwing in the land of Blogger, and half of our favorite BikePortland photographs from Portland's evening World Naked Bike Ride had issues and failed!

So we are bringing them back in full glory!







All images via BikePortland. Thanks for documenting and sharing our display of vulnerability!

BikeSmut 6: Turning TriXXX

OH IT IS ON!

Bike Smut has never been more graphic.
More revolutionary sex!
More queer bike!
More awesome performances!
More Bike Love!

MORE! MORE! MORE!
ENCORE!  ENCORE!

Bike Smut 6 is Turning TriXXX across North America


With films from two feminist porn award winners, as well as entries from 6 different European countries, we have never been so excited to share this art. Below we have a list of all the brilliant and diverse films you will see at the show!


Slut <3 Bike <3 Love  (2:40)
Sarah Armstrong & Rødbro, 2012, Copenhagen, Denmark
A story of bike-sexual sluts and their search for freedom in the city.  A gang of girls get on their bikes to see what they can find.

Muchar Living Pictures, 2011, Graz, Austria
An erotic dream of indoor bicycle racing.

Tinto Brass, 1998, Italy
Tinto Brass has been long considered the King of European erotica and is most famous for the film ‘Caligula’. ‘Monella’ is from much later in his career, but opens with one of the most charming scenes of bike-sexulaity in mainstream cinema.

A Ride (5:32) 
AntionnexVx, 2011, London, UK
One room, one chair, two characters dressing up for a ride.

Lexo City Bike Tour (3:20)
Lexo, 2012, Italy
An Italian woman ass-erts herself on a city-provided bike.

Queer porn hotties Courtney Trouble and Bianca Stone find themselves covered in grease after some careless riding ends in a dramatic bike crash. They kiss and make up and go to rinse off. They scrub each other squeaky clean, and make sure to get each other off before they get back on their bikes.

Pandora Blake, 2012, Surrey, UK
Molly has arranged to meet her girl in the woods for a picnic, but Pandora has other things on her mind. She knows how horny it makes Molly to have her bottom smacked, and that gorgeous bum looks so sexy perched on her bike saddle that Pandora tells her lover to stay there while she spanks her.

PUMP! (6:04)
Rev Mook, 2012, Los Angeles, CA
A girl riding in the desert gets a flat, soft tire. Unable to find help, she discovers a bike pump! Unfortunately the pump fails to get the tire hard enough for her liking, so she explores alternative methods to convince the pump to make the tire hard.

Smut Noir (3:45) 
Megan D. and Jenn H., 2012, Portland, OR
A private detective is on the hunt for a notorious bike thief.  When she finally tracks down the culprit,  she hits her with some hard punishment. These three-time Bike Smut contributors have chosen to use the noir style for their latest work.

Bike Maintenance (6:00)
Adrian, 2011, Berlin, Germany
A self-described chronic masturbator and bike lover services himself and his bike at the same time.

The Bike Wizard (6:15)
Jessie Sparkles, 2012, Seattle, WA
Two budding bike-sexuals are confused about how things go together. Good thing the Bike Wizard is around to help them figure things out.

Madison Young, Girlfriend Films, 2012, San Francisco, CA
A peak at an epic lesbian bike porn adventure. Feminist Porn award winner, Madison Young, explores the many ways queer bike messengers might get frisky during an average day at work. One of the only bike porns to ever been released on DVD.

Come Find Me (21:33) 
Courtney, Trouble, Poppy Cox and Rev Phil, 2012, Oakland, CA
A woman wakes up to an enticing polaroid, inviting her on a bike powered scavenger hunt.  After a lot of teasing she gets her thrilling reward.  

After 6 years, we still do not make DVDs or put these films online. The only way to see this program is to come to a screening.

June 25, 2012

More Naked Media III

Gadzooks! One might think with all the hubub we would be able to post pictures of beautiful naked bodies gloriously traversing the barriers time, space and modesty FOREVER.

We sure hope so.

motorists are encouraged to flee their vehicles at once
 
defending the streets for bodies

dancing naked *IS* political protest

wants you to ride, EVERYDAY


More pictures are available, thanks to our very own
defenders of mobile liberty, PDX Bike Swarm
!!!

Riding Nature

in April we had the life-affirming blessing of meeting and watching porn with Annie Sprinkle. That was amazing and we were inspired. We decided to do a weekly show with all new content in the month of May to help get you SPRUNG!

And now we get to help blaze the singletrack to merging radical sexuality with fucking nature! Gently!

Its the EcoSex Symposium!


FRIDAY, JUNE 29, 2012


Opening Ceremony
EcoSex Symposium Skype In: Annie Sprinkle & Beth Stephens call us from their backyard!

Opening Keynote
The New Orgasmic Revolution on Planet Earth" by Serena Anderlini D'Onofrio

Conveniently coinciding with our upcoming world premiere of BikeSmut 6: Turning TriXXX



 w00t!

June 23, 2012

More Naked Media II

It is about time for you to
Crank my chain!

Our friends at Crank My Chain have been making great bicycle themed movies for most of the past decade. While many of the rest of us are content to angle for simply better marking of streets and infrastructure, or just to get drunk for free, they have worked to help keep the riot in patriot.





This is a poem found on the Occupy Wall Street Bicycle Coalition site set to the World Naked Bike Ride in Portland, Oregon. The poem is about the Naked Bike Ride and life and liberation.



Keep rockin in the free world, sans pants

June 22, 2012

Still Spankin' It

How excited are we!?! On top of having our final screening of The Orgasm Trail tonight in Vancouver, BC tonight we have just received a series of publishable still images from our "south of London" submission, "Saddle Sore".

That means we are able to provide you, the public, unprecedented access to images from Bike Smut 6: Turning TriXXX which premiere's next Friday in Portland!




We will start you off slow, but if you start to feel your cheeks reddening too fast please ask us to slow down. Communication is key.

June 21, 2012

More naked media!



We know what you want, and you are right to ask for it...


 

BECAUSE IT IS SO FUCKING GOOD!!
 enjoy this video with 1000s and 1000s of naked bikers and remember you can ride your bike with as much, or as little clothes whenever you want

June 20, 2012

Vancouver : the Last Orgasm

NO! Must it be? Alas tis true...

After traveling 10s of thousands of miles to bring you the most ethical porn in the world our plucky team of bicycle pornographers have concluded that this will be the final stop on

THE ORGASM TRAIL

Bike Smut: the Orgasm Trail will be showing at the 
Russian Hall (600 Campbell @ E. Georgia) this 
Friday the 22nd, 7:45pm, $9 for all the 
DIY bicycle p0rn you could beg for

All things must come to an end, (except circles? ... until you break a spoke!) and we couldn't ask for a better place than the home of bikesexuality. For before there was the World's Largest Naked Bike Ride, there was the Wholesome Undie Ride. Before there was Bike Smut there was BikeSexual.org


So while Portland is the current reigning champion of all bike culture, it owes a lot of it's current rad-ness to the folks up north who have been throwing down since the beginning.



In their honor, we are leaving our glorious home to re-stoke the flames of bike passion! We'll be joining forces with Velopalooza, (Pedalpalooza in Vancouver) and Bike!Bike! (a gathering of bike nonprofits and collectives)!





Our itinerary starts on Friday, June 22 at 10:30am PST with us on Pedal Revolutionary talk show. Here is a blurb they put out:
We are going to perform another radio striptease, with racy music to get you in the mood for bike-loving! Time for an hour and a half of the raw Reverend Phil; committed, unadulterated, and ever-so-obliging! Tune in to hear the stirring sounds of whispered expletives, torn-off rain ponchos and peeled-down bike shorts!

You'll also have the chance to win tickets to this Friday's Bike Smut: the Orgasm Trail by answering challenging skill-testing questions such as: "What are you wearing?" Note: you need to be a current member of Coop Radio to win, but it's easy to join. If you make a pledge using this form and send it back to me you're eligible. Pay-what-you-want for this -- your donation will support bike radio and cooperatively-owned community radio into the future. Anyone pledging $60 or more will get a CD of amazing bicycle music!!! (Or a download if you want to save plastic.)


Then join the Bike Bike-ers as we dissect and analyze the connection between bikes and sexuality with our "Dismantling Bike Porn Collage Making Workshop" Friday at Purple Thistle @ 4:30
Feel free to BYO scissors, glue, and stacks of porn or bike mags for cutting. Or just use ours!



Then the big show just up the street from the workshop to the Russian Hall (doors at 7:45) for the FINAL SCREENING OF THE ORGASM TRAIL.

There will be other fine events happening all weekend and summer long, check out the Velopalooza calendar or just go out on your bike and see what joy you can discover!



beware clicking this facebook event link will take your browser to facebook
http://www.facebook.com/events/279824858782854/



photo credit to:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ttcopley/ and 
http://www.ianpaterson.org

June 19, 2012

Coast to Fucking Coast


Tre excitement! International radio Coast to Coast! You can hear the talking of the DJ and even if you can't speak French you probably can understand what she says!




We are totally on the Canadian Radio! Twice! in 3 days! 

Join Bike Smut on "Pedal Revolution"!  This is an extra special (not last Friday of the month) Show
This Friday, June 22nd at 1030am
Listen at 102.7fm, or live streaming at coopradio.org
http://www.pedalrevolutionary.org/

We have been told there will be stripping, LIVE! on the air! Possibly alcopop drinking. Which are almost totally illegal in Canada! We might also do some google hangout or something, so keep your peepers peeled!


Then this Sunday at 5:30 AM PST (OMGWHAT!!!???!!!)

Join us as we take an auditory ride on "Bike Lane" on CKUT 90.3FM in Montreal, Canada. We doubt there will be live stripping at 5:30 am, but maybe some folks in France will join us for some afternoon delight!
 

ya never know what them french canadians will get up to...

So we will be audible on either end of the Canada, and almost on either end of the radio spectrum, which is pretty cool.

Tune in like Tokyo!

The world's largest naked bike ride

Have you seen the stacks of naked bodies everywhere?

There is excellent writeup and photos of the WNBR via BikePortland.

And here a quick hitting, 30-second video of Portland's daytime ride

June 18, 2012

Media Monday: ATTACK OF THE POPPY COX




Many of you have seen her, either on stage dancing to Eartha Kit (the beloved soulful voice that describes what she might do to you, underneath the bridges of Paris) or deftly breezing around traffic on her fixed gear, British-made 'Falcon'. But even if your only introduction to Poppy Cox was in her recent essay on slut-shaming, (in reference to when a commenter on this blog referred to her as a "spokeslut") you are aware of her impact on Bike Smut.

Beyond crafting new bikesexual graphic images and press packs (because the media can't have a DVD we might as well try to let them know what is in store for people) she has also been able to pick up a number of interviews. Just last week Elle of Tits and Sass sat down with Poppy to investigate  some of the more feminine juices that have been flowing around these parts.
Between April and November, and we visited 21 countries and 63 cities, showing our films. They loved us in Italy, people went nuts, and we were in television news. We really want to inspire people to actively pursue feeling good, and we think riding bikes and having sex are great ways to do that.
That and more of our Poppy Cox is avilable on line and possibly riding a strip club pole or bicycle  near you!

Here are a few more pics of Eartha Kitt. She was quite an inspiration!


Eartha Kitt was a fine Catwoman


"Well you seemed to have made a wet spot, Joker"





June 15, 2012

World Nake Bike Pictures

 For a few hours this weekend Portland, Oregon returns to the life-affirming embrace of Cascadia

THE WORLD NAKED BIKE RIDE


It is hard to describe how amazing it feels. How something so simple can be so revolutionary.

Our weekly alternative newspaper the Portland Mercury, asked us for some insight. Here are some highlights from Sara Mirk's article
• Fanny packs are modesty flaps; says Bike Smut film festival organizer Reverend Phil Sano. Point taken. Also useful for staying discreet: a mask.
• Wear some damn clothes. Namely, shoes and a helmet. Cheek-to-seat action is not so bad, but tender-foot-to-pedal is no fun.

Its a bare as you dare ride, so you can wear clothes or tongs or nothing at all! Everyone rolling under their own power is welcome to join! So much fun! Join in the action no matter where you are!




Bike Smut is hosting a DIY paint station! Be there when the gates open at 9 and goes as long as the paint lasts.


This collection of great photos courtesy of a website that tragically branded them, even tho they just stole them from the original artists. oh well.  it does include an interesting camera logo reminding tus that we are always under surveillance, even when not riding your bike naked.

This event is made possible in Portland by Shift's free fun event: Pedalpalooza, Umbrella and a number of loving individuals who want you to experiece more joy and liberty in your lives. 




June 12, 2012

Thanks for getting SPRUNG!

HA! Between receiving your exciting new expressions of bike romance, planning the brutal public flogging of the worst transportation planners in Cascadia and helping to organize the estimated TEN THOUSAND naked bodies that will fill the streets of Portland in the worlds largest naked bike ride we have not really taken account of all the action we have had going on over here.

Paul Hanna/Reuters


We got you SPRUNG!

Well its been nice sharing with you many of our favorite non-bike specific erotic/porn movies. Many expressed regret not being able to attend all of the shows, and that is reasonable. Each program was stunningly different and with no content repeating...

We would like to offer our thanks to our many supporters including...

our inspired filmmakers:
Bruce LaBruce's infamous story of leftist queer sex revolution "Raspberry Reich"
Tinto Brass's tale of a young, horny, Italian girl demanding sex... NOW!  "Monella
Courtney Trouble's oversexed FTM's hunt for his stolen bike "Billy Castro Does the Mission"
Jenifer Lyon Bell's patient expression of love in a world gone soundbyte "Skin. Like. Sun."
Rinse Dream's surreal hardcore post apocalypse art house midnight movie, "Cafe Flesh"

our glorious performers:
Hammercise who created all new bikesexual dance moves for our performance
Miss Steak who's erotic Jesus Christ Superstar puppetry shocked and stunned
Fatha Green who's magnanimous use of the mic humbled and entertained


and also the folks at the Clinton St Theater for their commitment to creating more interesting, local content not to mention and all the people around town who thought our image of a pair of birds humping on bicycle handlebars was not at all offensive (especially because we have not been able to put up ANY of our TURNING TRIXXX posters anywhere!)

So, there you have it. Five successful screenings on the themes that matter to people who like to get around and not let anyone else tell them how or who to ride. It seems the answer to life might be a paraphrased quote of the Portlandia:"Put a fucking bird on it!"


June 4, 2012

Media Monday: Erections are What's Up

Our desk is cluttered with sometimes insightful, hilarious and all too frequently, time consuming media. What is a bicycle pornographer about to end the Call For Submissions to do?

RING EM UP!

Sometimes folks say: "I get the porn, but why bikes? Why not chairs, or vibrators?"
To which I reply: "A bike is a chair AND a vibrator"



What they really wanna know is, why makes bike culture better than anything else you could do with your time. That question is a little more challenging. There is a lot of amazing things going on out there  but we frequently are very impressed with the resourcefulness of Bike Punks.

We don't mind fancy-pants bike events (although paying to ride seems as intuitive as driving to the corner store... have you tried the alternative? NOT PAYING?) but having a group struggle a little for their art/play makes us all enjoy it a little more than just handing over $35 and getting a t-shirt full of sponsors at the end.*

Take for example our Bike Smut hosts in Graz, Austria. They didn't have money for an indoor race track, so they built one... actually they built several, in their own homes. 

photo by "RADhofer"

The story is a little more complicated than that, but everyone enjoyed the process and time trial indoor racing so much that they have been doing it pretty regularly now for over a year. Here are some SFW pics of the riders.

We at Bike Smut are hardly exclusionary, but we are getting more selective in our age. Still if someone is not willing to try another culture's art because 'what is the point of exploration?' you can just about assume that this person will have an answer for everything and they all result in this person being right without failure. That's nice for the Fox News mindset, but being able to be challenged and come away from something with a new angle that's why we learn and do new things!

Speaking of learning new things this graphic website is fill of interesting, if not very useful info on sex. Sometimes their facts are humorous, sometimes scandalous, (it is the internet, after all) but generally they are shoulder shruggingly unimportant. More interesting then their fact that Miami has the longest sex of any US city and that Denver Phoenix or Chicago have the shortest, is that the entire difference is only 9 min. WHOA, you mean people have sex for more than 9 min!?! AMAZING

This June is a little more sane for us, we only have THE FINAL FINAL SCREENING OF THE ORGASM TRAIL ... EVER

Vancouver Friday June 22nd, which would be monumental in its own right but just a week later is

THE WORLD PREMIERE OF BIKE SMUT 6: TURNING TRIXXX
at the Clinton St Theater in Portland, Oregon

Go ahead, freak out a little, just save some for us.



*its statements like this that will keep us legit (i.e. poor)