September 29, 2016

Bike!Bike! Wants the D

Once considered the city of the future, Detroit has been on a decline almost as long as Buffalo. Now its famous for its decay and rebirth. But what kind of phoenix will rise from the ashes of Motor City? We have seen what extensive highways diving roads does to neighborhoods, what the legacy of Robert Moses means for childhood asthma, what abandoned buildings mean to bikers obsessed with post-apocalypse-themed pornography!
It means doing the hard work of organizing within and between communities. It means going outside your comfort zone today to improve your opportunities tomorrow. It means seeing our vulnerabilities as an opportunity for growth. It means making space for others to grow. It means the future is in our hands.

Don't let your idle hands be the devil's plaything! Unless that is what you are into, but don't expect any pleasureful rubbing in return. Get in there and get your hands dirty in a good way!

This weekend Detroit hosts Bike! Bike! the annual gathering of bike collectives. Folks interested in learning and sharing host workshops and events. Including but not limited to the LAST EVER screening of Bike Smut in Detroit.

Come for the smut, stay for the radical civic betterment.

Bike Smut 9: Science Friction
Saturday, October 1st
4210 Trumbull
7:40 pm
$9 donation
Adults Only

September 26, 2016

Rim Job Across The Rust Belt

What's this? So much porn that even we epic bloggers of 10 years cannot keep up? With over a thousand posts, many of them with salient information it was bound to happen sometime. We had a show in Buffalo and we didn't even make a post for it! Wasupwiththat?!?
  We had a full house in Buffalo! Sorry if you didn't hear about it. Thanks to Hot Mommas for  hosting us and all these fab performers. It was a wild night. So much excitement, and also confusion and also delight.

So we have officially started our final tour of the land of steel. This part of the country has seen better days but we love a touch of grey, or in this case, patina, in our rides. So we are delighted to be in the midst of our Rim Job Across The Rust Belt mini tour. Its already started hitting us fast. Saturday night was an epic blur, which probably means it was a success because other than the people who were ejected for yelling racist shit (no doubt, doing their part to Make American Porn Great Again) everyone was beaming massive smiles.

We hope to post some videos soon but for now these glam pics will have to suffice. So exciting to have our our Jetson's-themed Rosie the Sex Robot!

Tuesday we return to Columbus OH, where we have not had a show since early 2008! So we have 8 years of inspiring porn to choose from. What will it be?  
  • consensual non-consent / forced haircuts from Chicago?
  • golden showers and swampy dendrophilia from Gainesville?
  • greasy cock -and-ball torture from Berlin?
  • spaghetti-western anarchists from Montreal?
  • gender queer Mario Brothers from Geneva?
  • hardfem, bicycle-mounted, cavalry-archers hunting to feed their sexual appetites in Phoenix? 
  • a hardcore, ginger-on-ginger bisexual, bikesexual educational film?
Either way, it will be a night to remember, and remember it is for ONE NIGHT ONLY!

Tuesday, Sept 27
Columbus, OH

FB Event

Bike Smut: Smut Pedalers Ride
6:30 PM at Goodale Park Shelter House

Ride starts at 7 to get you all geared up for the show
Adult activities along the way

Bike Smut 9: Science Friction

8:30 PM, NoWhere House
1217 N 4th St.
9pm Show begins!
Suggested donation $5
Adult Beverages and snacks available
Screen printing of your items available on site for small donations as well. Bring something sexy!

Cum with the group or on your own. Provocative short films and titillating performances. 

Next stop: Bike!Bike! wants the D

Art and Illustration by Mickey Harmon

September 21, 2016


We are fresh out of Harvest Festival, the electro-dance filled forest 300 km north of Toronto. We partied, we made silly, we worked with our local host to fabricate a pedal-powered disco... and we showed some classic bicycle pornography to some hippies in the woods. Now its time to get deep into Canada's most popular city for our last ever screening here!

The first show we ever did was at Cine Cycle and, honest to mercy, it included some locally made, live-action tentacle porn.

this is not from that show but gawd we love Huebucket's work

The following year we were treated to some bicycle bondage as our hosts proceeded to tie up and suspend $15,000 worth of bikes that made as art, never to be ridden. Plus a dance party that raged past dawn. Stunning.

Our 5th year was half consumed by our first European tour, the other half we were driving back along the southern border on The Orgasm Trail (because the south didn't get the 4th year)

We returned to Cine Cycle for Bike Smut 6: Turning Trixxx, which included our first collaboration from the amazing sex-positive store, Good For Her. On top of providing excellent body-positive support to those exploring sexuality they also organize the Feminist Porn Awards, which are on sabbatical at the moment, likely for similar reasons that Bike Smut is retiring... when you hold yourself to such high standards its difficult to maintain a pristine track record, and as they say, no good deed goes unpunished.

The following year was a somewhat stressful ride from Buffalo that included an emergency repair of our hand-built trailer.   There was some serious biker cred back in those days. Yeesh!

Last year we upped-the-punx with a collaboration with Soy Bomb housing coop and the Welcome to Toronto art collective.  Fabulous art was made and distributed and the party was a massive success.

This year we return to our Toronto roots. Back with the crazy old British bike mechanic who loves independent film and dirty jokes. Come on down and wish us farewell as we dance the night away!

Thursday September 22 
CineCycle 129 Spadina Avenue (in the Coach house in the Alley)
7:30 pm doors
8:15 pm show
9:30 pm afterparty private FB event

LIVE ENTERTAINMENT! with Mineta and 3 DJs!


September 9, 2016

Fin Du Monde Cyclosessual

Pour la dernière fois, Bike Smut, le festival cyclo-érotique, est de retour à Montréal

Bike Smut, un festival international itinérant qui célèbre le vélo et une culture du sexe positive, s’arrête à Montréal pour la cinquième et dernière fois ce samedi à 20:00 au Café L’Artère. Sous le thème de la “Science Friction” cette année, le festival présente à chaque édition une nouvelle programmation de films sur le vélo et le sexe, faits par des cyclistes, des cinéastes et queers du monde entier. 

“Faites-vous partie de ceux qui pensent que de meilleurs moyens de transport et qu'une vie sexuelle épanouie sont la clef d'une meilleure qualité de vie ? Ou pensez-vous simplement que faire du vélo est sexy ? Ou alors pédaler vous fait juste du bien ?” demande Rev Phil Sano, un des organisateurs du festival.

Faire un film, c'est facile ! Le diffuser peut être plus compliqué. Au cours des 10 dernières années, le festival a voyagé un peu partout pour montrer et partager ces contenus des plus excitants. Les vidéos présentés ne sont pas offerts en DVD ni diffusés sur le net. La seule façon de voir ces films, c'est de se déplacer aux séances (18 ans et plus) toutes remplies d'adultes consentants ! Libre à tous d'exprimer vos idées sur le vélo et le sexe sans risquer que son boss, grand-mère ou ex-vélo ne le découvre !

Il y aura des performances, des jeux, des choses à gagner et 90 minutes de films érotiques radicaux qui célèbrent le vélo - centrés sur la femme, centré sur l'hommes, trans, queer, gay et “bikesexuels”. Et c'est votre seule chance de les voir.

samedi sept 10
7000 Avenue du Parc
présentations 20h       
films 21h       
party 23h       
$5-10 donation
Adults Only

September 6, 2016

au revior, Montreal

Montreal, we are ending this Francophilic relationship!

Well, more like we hope all you french-friendly folk will come visit us for a change as this Saturday is the LAST EVER screening in Montreal.

Lets take a moment to think back to some of the highlights of the past several episodes in Quebec.

Fleshback to the first time Bike Smut played in MTL we opened for a play party we a variety of sexual acts happening all over. Dubious that Interstice still exists but it was in Griffintown and it was amazing. Naturally there are not many photos but they did send us this a few days later.

We came back to Montreal to bring Bike Smut 4:PLAY to a place called Death Church in Verdun a year later. It really was an old church that had been refurbished to produce a more METAL experience. Go figure, the capital city of North America has more churches than it knows what to do with. It was a good screening from the crusty punks who had a variety of sex toys made from bike parts. That was our first experience with DIY Montreal poutine: buy a big bag of curds direct from a farm, then get your fries and gravy sourced from the local corner store.

Our break out show in Montreal was Bike Smut 6: Turning Trixxx. We had a lot of investment and the larger bike community finally got to put the pieces together. This was our first time in Café L'Artère, coopérative de solidarité

The talented performers of Solar Year set the mood before our show started:

Miss Poppy Cox was speaking immensely adorable (and pretty accurate) French to the crowd:


Then the following year our fabulous hosts brought us to a historic strip club, Cafe Cleopatra. The debauchery was on and the dancing was good. This marked the north-easternmost corner of the Porny Express bike tour. Reverend Phil rode through the encroaching winter with the addition of bike tube gaskets, a cheap and easy way to keep the muck out of your bearings. Whew! With as dirty as we get it was a welcome addition.


We returned to Cleopatra for "Come Again" when we showed the full version of Brazen Saddles, one of the most ambitious films produced for Bike Smut. Bringing together the entire community. With lots of exploration and tension, a biker gang being chased by a bike cop laid a trap then they decided to really Fuck the Police... consensually! This was extra meaningful because our event took place over May Day so the revolutionaries were out in the streets.

You can just see the gas canisters being shot at the crowd from the Police in the distance

after the police added gas there was a lot of chaos
which resulted in 1000s of people scattered across the streets

Those amazing handmade vests that were featured in Brazen Saddles (learn more about this fab film here) were created within the Montreal Biker community. We got to see some behind the scenes creations of Oxyd Creations. If you know a badass biker you want to get one of these handmade vests; if you want more pegging start with a harness that looks good and feels good! We wrote about their fresh bikesexual wear last year and we are excited to have them vending with Bike Smut again this year!


Now we go back to Café L'Artère and have a lot of exciting times planned. Stay tuned for more details on presentations, performers, DJs, discounts for entry, and extra fun we are working to having with you!

Saturday, September 10
7000 Avenue du Parc
8pm presentations
9pm cinema
11pm dance